Mu mibanire y’abashakanye hari igihe kigera hakabaho kudahuza urugwiro biturutse kuri umwe muribo, gutera urubariro ku rugo bikaba bitagikorwa uko byahoze mbere. Ni ikibazo gitera umwuka mubi mu bashakanye bikaba byanavamo ingeso yo gucana inyuma.
Iki kibazo giterwa n’impamvu zinyuranye. Tugiye kurebera hamwe igice cya mbere cy’izo mpamvu Barada Clementine yanditse kuri Blog ye Sawa2Gender:
1.Nta suku ugira
Impumuro ufite haba mu kanwa cyangwa mu myanya y’ibanga yawe ituma uwo mwashakanye nta bushake akugirira. Mu maha n’imyanya y’ibanga yawe ifite umwanda.
Inama: Isukure mbere yo kuryama no kubaka urugo,wiyigoshe mu gihe gikwiriye.
2.Uburyo ukorakora/ utegura uwo mwashakanye
Iyo ukora ku myanya y’ibanga y’uwo mwashakanye ntugomba gukoresha ingufu cyangwa gukomeretsa iyo myanya cyangwa ngo umukoreho ku buryo butuma atisanzura. Inama mugutegura uwo mwashakanye mu gihe mugiye kubaka urugo wibanda ku bice by’ibanga by’umubiri we, ahantu ukora hatuma yishima cyangwa hatuma ubushake bwe bwiyongera. Kumenya ibyo bice bisaba ko uba ubizi mwarabiganiriyeho cyangwa ufata umwanya wo kubishakisha. Ca inzara, tekereza ku buryo naho uri gukora,kora ibintu gahoro gahoro ushyiremo urukundo.
3.Iyo uri mu gikorwa cyo kubaka urugo uratinda cyane cyangwa urangiza vuba
Ok simvuze ngo umare umunota umwe ariko nanone kumara amasaha 3 utararangiza bishobora gutuma ubushake mugenzi wawe yarafite bugabanuka cyangwa bugashira burundu. Gufata umwanya umutegura kugirango yishime mu gikorwa cyo kubaka urugo ni byiza cyane ,ikibazo cyaba igihe uko gutinda ari wowe gushingiyeho gusa. Ikindi kuvunagura umuntu ,gukoresha ingufu ugamije kumwemeza si byiza .
Inama: Igikenewe ni udukoryo,ubumenyi,gushimisha,no kunezeza mugenzi wawe. Muganire mwemeranye kubyo mushaka mwembi nicyo mugamije,mukosore ibitagenda,muhe agaciro ibiri kubashimisha.
4.Ukora ibintu bimwe mu buriri
Iyo uwo mwashakanye ashatse kugerageza ikintu gishya uranga,ukihagararaho cyangwa ukamutwama. Iyo uhora ukora ibintu bimwe buri gihe bigeraho bikarambirana. Sex ni art, gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina mu gihe cyo kubaka urugo ni ubuhanga ni ukugerageza ibintu byinshi. Ukwiye kwerekana icyo uzi gukora mu buryo bwinshi butandukanye kandi ukirekura ,ugakora utuntu dushya kandi tugushimisha tugashimisha na mugenzi wawe.
5.Guceceka cyangwa kuvuga amagambo menshi mu gihe muri kubaka urugo
Gusakuza cyane, kuvuga amagambo aterekeranye nibyo murimo,kubaza ibibazo byinshi no guceceka nk’ikiragi si byiza mu gihe muri kubaka urugo. Inama : abagabo bakunda kumva umugore wishimye akanabyumvikanisha mu gihe bari muri icyo gikorwa kingenzi ariko burya n’umugore yumvishe ko umugabo we yishimye ntabwo byamugwa nabi.Abo bombi bakabikora mu buryo butabangamira bagenzi babo.
6.Ibaze niba uwo mwashakanye ataba afite imwe muri izi mpamvu bigatera kutuzuza inshingane ze
– Mufitanye ibibazo,ubwumvikane buke mu rugo rwanyu?
– Arashaje?
– Ararwaye? Ahobora kuba anafite ikibazo kigabanya ubushake bwo kubaka urugo.
– Afite ibibazo by’akazi cyangwa ibindi bibazo bimukomereye?
– Anywa inzoga nyinshi cyangwa anywa ibiyobyabwenge bimuca intege ?
– Afata imiti yagabanya ubushake?
– Akora sport zirenze urugero?
– Hari icyo wahindutseho gitera uwo mwashakanye kutwakwifuza?
– Mwarabyaye mufite umu umwana ukiri muto?
7.Guhoza mugenzi wawe ku nkeke kumubwira nabi,kumuhohotera,kumutesha umutwe, kumubabaza kenshi warangiza ugakenera ko mu gihe cyo kubaka urugo akunezeza.
Inama: iyo uwo mwashakanye ameze neza,yishimye kubaka urugo bigenda neza cyane iyo hari ikitagenda muri we cyane cyane ari wowe nyirabayazana kugushimisha mu gihe cyo kubaka urugo biba bigoye cyane.
8. Gushaka gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina inshuro nyinshi cyane mu gihe uwo mwashakanye mudateye kimwe bishobora kumubangamira bikaba intandaro yo kukwiyima cyangwa kwinuba mugihe umusabye kubaka urugo.
Inama : kuganira nuwo mwashakanye mukarebera hamwe ikibazo gihari nuko buri wese yiyumva mugashaka umwanzuro utababangamira cyangwa gushaka umuganga wabagira inama ku buryo mwakwitwara.
9.Kunenga no kutanyurwa
Iyo muri mu gikorwa cyo kubaka urugo ukunze kunenga,kunegura, ibyo mugenzi wawe akora mu gihe mukora urukundo. Cyangwa se ntujya unyurwa nibyo uwo mwashakanye akora ngo agushimishe muri gukora urukundo,kandi ukabimubwira. Inama: Irinde amagambo atesha agaciro cyangwa annyega uwo mwashakanye kuko byaba intandaro yo kwifata cyangwa kwanga kugira ikindi kintu akorana nawe kuko yumva ko icyo yagukorera cyose ntacyo bimaze.
10.Urukundo rwarashize cyangwa aguca inyuma
Ntakigukunda ku buryo atakikwifuza? Waramubabaje cyane ku buryo kugukenera byashize,byagabanutse? Yaba se aguca inyuma ku buryo yirengagiza ko nawe uhari ukeneye gukora urukundo?
Igice cya kabiri kizabageraho vuba. Inyunganizi, kubaza cyangwa ikindi cyose ushaka kugishaho inama kuri uru rubuga, wohereza ubutumwa bwawe kuri [email protected]
HAFASHIMANA Siapata
jewumufasha wanje afisikibazo camahera ntanyegera.none mwompanuriki?umunsi yayabuzazocanyirukana?