Ni ibihe bibazo by’ubuzima byibasira abagabo nyuma y’uko abagore babo babyaye?

Abantu benshi batekereza ko agahinda n’akababaro biza nyuma yo kubyara ari imimerere igira ingaruka gusa ku bagore. Nyamara mu by’ukuri, ibi bigera no ku bagabo ndetse ubushakashatsi buvuga ko bene ibi bigera ku bagabo bagera ku 10%.

PND cyangwa Post-Natal Depression wagenekereza nk’agahinda gakabije nyuma yo kubyara ni indwara yo mu mutwe ifata ababyeyi nyuma yo kwibaruka umwana. Nta kabuza ko kuza k’umwana mu rugo nubwo bitera ibyishimo kamere, ariko binazana n’ibindi bibazo n’impinduka kandi zidasiga abagabo.

Kimwe ni uko igihe umugore arizwa n’umwana amwonsa i saa cyenda zo mu gicuku, hiyongereyeho igise cyamuriye rimwe na rimwe akanabagwa ngo abyare, uburwayi no gucika intege k’umubiri byamubayeho atwite, umugabo nk’uwamuteye inda ashobora kumva yishinja ikosa hiyongereyeho ko rimwe na rimwe hari ibyo nta cyo yakoraho icyo gihe.

Impinduka mu misemburo

Hari impamvu nyinshi zitera agahinda nyuma yo kubyara ku bagabo, muri zo hakaba harimo mpinduka ziba ku misemburo yabo.

Umwe mu misemburo igerwaho n’impinduka ni uwa testosterone, uyu ukaba ari umusemburo wa kigabo ugenga ihuzabitsina, n’ibindi bimuranga nk’uw’igitsina gabo ndetse n’uburumbuke bwe. Indi misemburo ishobora kubaho impinduka ni uwa cortisol, vasopressin, na prolactin.

Ibi kenshi biterwa n’ibintu runaka, harimo nko kubura ibitotsi nyuma y’uko umwana avutse, kubura ubufasha cyangwa ibibazo by’amafaranga.

Ibi kandi bishobora kuba ku mugabo ku myaka yose yaba afite. Icyakora ngo agahinda gakabije gatera abagabo nyuma yo kubyara kibasira ku kigero cyo hejuru abagabo babyaye bari mu nsi y’imyaka 25 y’amavuko kurusha uko bigera ku bari mu myaka yisumbuye kuri iyo.

Izindi mpamvu zishobora gutera agahinda gakabije ku bagabo nyuma yo kubyara harimo nko kuba uwo mugabo yarigeze kurwaraho iyo ndwara mbere, kuba atabana cyangwa atumvikana na nyina w’umwana, ibibazo by’amafaranga n’ibindi.

Ibimenyetso

Ibimenyetso by’agahinda ka nyuma yo kubyara ni bimwe n’iby’agahinda gasanzwe. Bimwe muri byo ni ibi:
• Kugira ubwoba, gucanganyikirwa, kwiheba no kuba atabona uko ejo hazamera
• Kwihunza umuryango, abo ku kazi n’ibikorwa bimuhuza n’abandi
• Kutamenya gufata imyanzuro
• Kugira umujinya
• Amakimbirane n’uwo bashakabye
• Guhohotera uwo bashakanye
• Imyitwarire mibi itajyanye n’iranga ababyeyi ‘bazima’.
• Kwiyahuza inzoga n’ibiyobyabwenge
• Kubura ibitotsi
• Umutwe udakira, impatwe no guhitwa
• Kuribwa amenyo no kugira isesemi
• Kubura ubushake bwo kurya, kugabanuka cyangwa kwiyongera kw’ibiro

Ibindi bimenyetso bishobora kuba ko umuntu yiyumva nta murava n’umwete yiyumva, kumva nta kimushimishije, kutita ku bintu uko asanzwe, rimwe na rimwe akaba yanatekereza kwiyahura.

Abagabo ntibakunda kwivuza iki kibazo
Ni ibisanzwe guhangayika no kugira ikibazo cy’ubuzima bwo mu mutwe nyuma y’uko umwana avutse. Ikindi, ibibazo by’ubuzima bwo mu mutwe benshi babifata nk’ibisanzwe ntibabyivuze ahubwo bikazavuzwa byarafashe intera.

Hari imvugo imaze iminsi yamamaye ivuga ko mu gihe “umwana amara mu nda ya nyima amezi icyenda, amara mu mutwe wa se imyaka y’ubuzima bwe bwose.”

Uguhangayika n’ibindi bibazo bigera ku mugabo nyuma yo kwitwa “papa” ni ibisanzwe cyane ku buryo hari uwabibafata nk’ubugabo “mbwa” gutatswa na byo kuko byaba bisa no kunyagiranwa n’abandi ukavuga ko wajabamye kubarusha.

Nyamara burya bgo “agahinda gakuzwa no kukihererana”. Ni ngombwa kwemera ko agahinda kabaho nyuma yo kubyara aii ikintu kibaho kandi ni ingenzi kucyitaho kimwe n’ibindi bibazo by’uburwayi bwo mu mutwe usanga bwariyongereye muri iyi minsi cyangwa buza mu yindi sura ugereranije n’uko byahoze mu myaka ishize.

Biba byiza kumenya ko iyi mimerere yigaragaza nyuma yo kubyara ishobora kubaho igihe cyose nyuma y’uko umwana avutse mu mwaka wa mbere cyangwa ibiri, si ikintu gishobora kubaho gusa mu mezi make ya mbere.

Ku bw’ibyo, igihe wumva usa n’uwibasiwe na bene iyi mimerere nyuma yo kubyara, ni ngombwa gushaka ubufasha, kuko si ibintu bifitiye inyungu amagara yawe gusa, ahubwo bishobora no kwangiza isano n’imibanire yawe n’umwana wawe.

Ikindi, kuko iyi ndwara ikora cyane ku marangamutima y’umutu ikagendana n’ibibazo by’imyitwarire y’imibanire y’umuntu n’abandi hari itera ibibazo mu mikurire y’umwana uyi mugabo abyaye.

Isano iri hagati y’ibibazo uyu mugabo agize n’imikurire y’umwana ikomera uko indwara uyu mugabo arwaye ikabya cyangwa ikaba igikatu.

Ikindi agahinda gakabije mu bagabo nyuma yo kubyara kangiza cyangwa kakagira ingaruka ku mubano w’urukundo hagati y’umugabo na nyina w’umwana. Uretse na nyina kandi, kagira ingaruka ku rukundo uyu mugabo agirira umwana we.

Usanga umugabo adashaka kwikoza uyu mwana cyangwa akamwikoza gake ari na ko adafata umwanya uhagije ngo akine na we rimwe na rimwe ndetse akamuvugaho amagambo mabi. Ntamuririmbira cyangwa ngo abe yamusomera, n’iyo abikoze akabikora gake cyane kandi bikenewe cyane ku mikurire y’umwana. Ikindi igihe ahana umwana, akamuhana akabya.

Ushobora gushakira ubufasha mu nshuti zawe, umuryango cyangwa umuganga.

Muri zimwe mu mpinduka zishobora kukubaho ni ukugira umujinya mwinshi. Abagabo bahanganye n’ibibazo by’ubuzima bwabo bwo mu mutwe kimwe mu bibaranga cyane ni uburakari bukabije.

Kugira ngo rero uhangane n’uwo mujinya, icya mbere ukwiye gukora ni ugutuza no kwihangana. Gerageza kugira ibyo urekura bigende [Let go off]. Ibi bishobora kugufasha kwiyumva neza kurushaho kuganira ibyerekeye ibyiyumvo byawe.

Hanyuma jya umenya kandi wigenzure igihe uganira ku bibazo byawe ndetse n’uwo ubiganiriza.

Urugero, bamwe mu bantu bashobora kubona byoroshye kuganira ibibazo byabo ku mbuga nkoranyambaga cyangwa mu matsinda ku bikoresho by’ikoranabuhanga rya interineti ikintu gishobora gutuma ibibazo byawe biba bibi kurushaho. Biroroshye kandi ni byiza gufata gahunda y’ubuzima bwo mu mutwe.

Hari abantu bamwe babibona nk’ibyoroshye gukoresha bene izi mbuga babaza ibibazo, bagisha inama no kuganirira rubanda uko biyumva.

Hari ibintu byagufasha guhangana n’agahinda gatera abagabo bafite abagore bamaze iminsi babyaye.

Ku bw’amahirwe, ugereranije n’imyaka mike ishize, ubumenyi kuri iki kibazo ndetse n’ubufasha gishobora gutangwaho byariyongereye kurusha mbere.

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